Whereas most people fall in love and start throwing around those magical words "I love you", how many actually realise what they are saying? Are they in love with the person because of the physical appearance? Because of the sexual pleasures? Because of money, prestige, benefits, or because they are just used to having someone around and afraid to be alone? If it is any of these, then that love cannot last... The physical will fade, the sexual pleasures will diminish with time without true and deep passion and true and deep feelings. And there will always be someone richer, more famous, more influential, more fun and better in whatever ways if you get bored and your heart begins to wander looking for something exciting and new to replace the old and mundane....
But true love means so much more. It is based on more than just the physical. It is more than just saying you love someone because you cannot bear to lose the happiness that person can give you. True love is because there is a deep bond between two people, far deeper and far more meaningful than any other bond you could ever develop with anyone else. True love is irreplaceable. True love means that you are willing to grow old with the person, willing to be with the person no matter what disease or disability should strike them in the future. You would not be afraid if the person should lose all mobility, your heart and mind will not stray if the other person should depend on you for their most basic needs. Nothing you do for the other person would be too strange, too perverse, too disgusting, too unnatural. Not even having to wipe the other person's bottom, not even having to carry or wheelchair someone around...
Is there is one thing I learned from being with mother as she is slowly getting weaker and losing her ability to do so many things we take for granted, I realise what it is I look for, what it is that I have always longed for in a relationship...
I need more than someone I can turn to and talk to when I am down and upset. I need more than someone I can laugh and laugh out loud and joke around. For I have friends who can fulfil that role. I need someone I can trust, fully, completely no matter what. I need someone who will be there for me no matter what, someone who will not be afraid to look at me, not be afraid to touch me, kiss me, hold me, even if I were to become disfigured, even if I were t lose my health and should disease eat away my looks and rot away my body. I need someone who will accompany me till the end (if I should go first...), and who will be by my side to soothe my pains and fears.
Because I know I have it in me to give someone all of that. Because I know with the experience of my mum, I am prepared and able to do all of that. And I wish for nothing less, nothing more...
相信愛 Believe in love
林育羣 Lin Yu Chun (the boy who famously covered Whitney's I will always love) you"
(translation mine)
Can [we] not hug one another?
Is it alright if we hold hands?
Love makes the world happy and warm,
You can feel it,
Baby Love is so easy.
Please believe, I love you.
There is no need for language, for I understand you.
We softly smile and breathe deep, deep (lying in my embrace breathing)
Love is so easy,
If there is love then there is a miracle.
So, love is as easy as breathing deeply (Hopefully our hearts can get even closer)
Believe in love,
Love is a safe harbour, [is] the most trustworthy thing you can lean on.
Believe me, my good friend,
You do not need be disheartened, the rain and the winds will accompany you as you struggle
Love is courage and hope.
Love is so easy,
Hold my hand,
Love is you and me,
Embrace me…
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