26 December 2015

Last night in Montreal

One last night, last couple of hours in Montreal...

The cat is sleeping on a heap of my clothing. It is cold, not horribly so, but chilly (surprisingly 'warm' for this time of the year...). The room is a mess, but at least the rest of the house is somewhat emptier.

A few more hours, and I am out of here. Home of the past six years.

Gone.

Last night in Montreal

Final night, final few hours in my own apartment in Montreal. Seven years here, and tomorrow I will be relocated to Toronto.

The house is a mess, at least my bedroom is. I've had to move all the remaining things into my bedroom, which now is just a pile of stuff. Boxes, papers, plastic bags, odd appliances and clothes all strewn over my bed. It's a horrible mess. And I'm in a pretty foul mood... My cousin is here, and fortunately he helped me a bit. Friends came by, just to say goodbye. Need friends even ask for help to get some help...? It's just been three, four weeks of packing, packing and sorting through things, and I am dead, dead tired. As someone said, it is even tougher doing it all by myself, having to do it all alone.

Last night in Montreal, and I am in this foul mood... sadly, this is the case, perhaps because I am just so exhausted mentally and physically (my jaw hurts from over grinding... my head aches from getting by with very little sleep...) Does anyone care or ask how I am doing? Not even my own brother or his family reached out to ask how I am doing or what I am doing this Christmas period...




22 December 2015

Flying "home"

Flying back to Montreal after a few days in Toronto. The move earlier in the week went smoothly. 30+ boxes of personal belongings and my bed all moved in a truck within a day. I'm settled now, at least the majority of my belongins have been moved. That was always the biggest headache. A headache that caused me much worry and stress, and even my night time grinding to intensify... Now it's just a matter of unpacking, and that will take some time. But I have time. Slowly, things will fall into place. Slowly, my home will be more and more personalised and my own. The arrival of the cats will be a giant leap in that regard. The cats will make things covered with hair but also with such warmth and sense of belonging. (Just hope the move next week will not be challenging....)

The last of the renovation work was completed with the delivery of the kitchen appliances and setting of the counter top for the kitchen. And yesterday, inadvettently while just walking down the street, I came across a store that had furniture made in Canada that were perfect for the condo. Deeply discounted and quality wood , made by local woodmakers. It was chance, it was fate. I didn't even have to go looking for it, it was just there, with a sign pointing up stairs. Like so many things associated with the purchase of this condo, it all happened so smoothly and flowed... 
Delivery of the furniture should be next week. And then I'm set (painting still needs to be done, but that can take some time...).

As I was unpacking some of the boxes, I careful unwrapped mum and dad's cups and bowls. The ones I use to offer them food and drinks on special days. I was again reminded of their absence, and imagined their joy of only they could see my place and stay at my own home... If only. Amid the joy and pride of owning my own home, I felt a tinge of sadness too. They worked so hard, and I have so much thanks to them... I am so fortunate to be able to buy and enjoy luxury appliances and poeceliain (all discounted of course, but still... ) Quality and living the high life compared to so many years of living so modestly in my previous apartment in Montreal. I imagine they would be happy to see my pride and joy, living on the top floor of a lovely little buidlinf in a great location. They would be assured, I am sure... 

As the plane banked away and ascended into the clouds, I felt this jubilation. I have a home. A beautiful home I can call my own. It'll be so personal, it'll be my private castle, shelter from the world, and my little private corner of the world . And it is no one else's. I have to be very careful to guard my place against others. My mum told me that, I remember, as friends in particular might try to take advantage of me seeing how I live alone, so I must be vigilante. Whatever people may say.

A few days in Montreal, one last Christmas celebration and then that's it. A new beginning at the end of a long year, and waiting to welcome the new year.