First post of 2009

I walked home in the light snow. Snow that floated down so slowly, some of which landed on my nose and tingled my skin. It was a clear, crisp night, cold, but not so much so, at least not as cold as I have experienced, and dare I say gotten used to somewhat. First transition from the old to the new year in Canada, and I think the first of many to come.

I spent the new year moment at Berri UQAM station. The moment came and went, and if it weren't for the loud banging and cheers of fellow passengers, I would not have known that a new day, indeed, a new year had begun. I guess it was how I wanted it.... not to get caught up in the uproar and rave of it all, not to have too many high expectations and hopes for a new year, so as not to feel bad about myself if I should not attain them.

At least I was not alone. Next to me, a new friend, a friend I've gotten close to, and who's gotten close to me. Both of us in that stage of life, trying to understand life, understand ourselves, so as to be able to receive the love that we need, and that we deserve.

Had a long chat with a friend that I've gotten to really know, and like. About all sorts of things, about the order of things in the world today, about life, family, and accepting yourself before you can accept love in your life. Again, like someone once told me, a partner should never be there to fill a void, to make you feel whole. A partner is there to add meaning and add love to an already confident and loving and lovable you. Anything less would be just selfish, and unhealthy to the person and to you. I sat there in the dim light of the cafe, music playing in the background, grasping my teacup, and slowly grasping this idea, this idea that I hope I will have the tenacity and the openness to accept into and live by in my life.

Originally my trip back to Taiwan was planned for the 16th, but somehow I was prompted to change my flight. Much to my surprise, that day was really bad for travelling, and the only available date was 9 January, a whole week earlier, meaning that I will miss one extra week of school. Not much to my liking, and I feel a little anxious having to skip school for so long... but sometimes there are more important things in life than school, and I must convince myself of that, and tell myself that it is not wrong to work on myself, work on my family first, then school work later.

Indeed, I would very much like to work on my feelings, my processing of dad's passing, in the hope that I can make peace with it, and make it part of my life that I can look at and feel comfort. Not regret, not sorrow (even though that is at times unavoidable), but to be able to look back and see that dad has gone further in a process of life (and in his case, death-- death being part of life), and that I can see his process as part of a continuation of my relationship with him, even though he may not physically be there any more.

So here's to a happy and peaceful 2009, of luck and good wishes, to me, and to all.

Savour Milk

Credits: http://www.cinema.ucla.edu/festival/fp10/presimages/HarveyMilk.gif

If you missed the Pope’s latest message of love and peace a few days ago, I will try to capture one of the essences. The Pope rightly reminds us that it is not only humanity’s responsibility to safeguard the “earth, water, and air as gifts of creation”; we must also ensure that the “order of creation” and the “nature of the human being as man and woman” be respected. Any “devaluation” of that order will lead to the “self-destruction of man”.

The general media is right to quickly jump to the conclusion that this is the latest attack on homosexuality, something that the Pope had earlier labelled as a "tendency" towards an "intrinsic moral evil”. In the true spirit of Christmas, the message of brotherhood, love and peace continues with His Holiness’ call to “defend love against sexuality as a consumer entity”, and to defend “the nature of man against its manipulation”. According to Benedict XVI, modern conceptions of “gender”, so “often expressed and understood”, has led humanity astray, driving man to “act alone and to dispose ever and exclusively of that alone which concerns him”, even if it means “living contrary to the truth”. So much for his Orbi et Urbi speech a few days later proclaiming that “hope – the heart of the Christmas message – is meant for all men and women” and that “the grace of God has appeared to all”. The words and emphases are His, not mine.

It is sad that such a message comes out of the mouth of one of the most influential religious figures, who is supposed to be God’s representative on Earth. And this coming three decades after the first openly-gay American politician Harvey Milk was cold-bloodedly assassinated.

Milk’s political career and rise is wonderfully captured in the movie with the same name. A somewhat soft-spoken man, he ran for office from his little camera shop on Castro Street of San Francisco. He mobilised the gay community and gay-friendly businesses and associations, galvonised workers’ unions and ethnic groups on a liberal platform. Milk’s campaigning would become a grassroots and integrated political process that championed not only equal rights for homosexuals, but also social welfare for the disadvantaged and marginalised. After a number of elections, he finally became a city supervisor. During his term in office, he spearheaded the passage of a gay rights ordinance in San Francisco, despite the fact that all throughout the US various counties and cities were rolling back equal protection of rights to work and privacy for gays.

America in the 1970s was marred by Christian fundamentalism. In the aftermath of various bans on same-sex marriage in various states of the US in November 2008, it is perhaps striking to draw parallels with America of then and today, which is similarly lead by a (neo-)conservative political force buoyed by a strong religious right wing. Then, with the likes of Anita Bryant, the ‘Save our Children’ campaign aimed to spread “Christian beliefs regarding the sinfulness of homosexuality and the perceived threat of homosexual recruitment of children and child molestation”. Today, through similar Bible thumpers and orthodox religious fundamentalists, such fabrications of truths and false propaganda are still being perpetuated and sanctioned with people’s blind faith in God. The spreading of fear about threats to core family values, myths about the “gay plague” and the “corruption” of children is used to startle and scare. It would be only a matter of years before people ‘came out’ to reveal the hypocrisy and “true nature” of priests who on the one hand preach against homosexuality and condemn child abuse, yet on the other hand commit such ‘sins’ behind the altar.

In messages and words similar to Obama today, Milk emphasised hope, and the need to give people hope. It is hope that can lead peoples previously sidelined and forgotten to unite and believe that change is possible. It is hope that can transcend the imaginary boundaries of sexuality, gender, class and race to forge an unstoppable force connected with shared longings for equality and social justice. It is therefore no wonder that Time proclaimed Milk one of the 100 most influential persons on the 20^th Century.

Shortly before Milk was assassinated, he uttered these bold words:

“If a bullet should go through my head let that bullet go through every closet door.”

Indeed, as the bullet pierced through his head that took his life, the bullet symbolically opened the doors of many previously closeted gays and lesbians. The assassin, a political rival of Milk, was left off lightly. An anti-gay jury agreed that junk food caused chemical imbalances in the perpetrator, and this defence was enough to lower the sentence to five years imprisonment for manslaughter.

Milk’s death, and his life of political activism, however, set an example for other gay-right activists to follow, and set a precedent for the gay-rights movement. Milk’s refusal to be silenced or to admit defeat when the country seemed to be against him, were based on that firm belief enshrined in the American Declaration of Independence: that “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights”.

I end where I began, and return to the enlightened message that not only the current Pope, but also many before him, have repeatedly brought across to millions and millions of believers, young and old.

Lest you have forgotten, salvation comes to those who does the Creator’s work, and lives by the Creator’s rules—despite the fact that this same Creator, His very grace and benevolence, are supposed to have appeared “to the whole of humanity”. Though the Creator has created all men equally, the Pope kindly reminds us that the perversion of sexuality and sex is a great threat to the human race—a s great a threat as global warming and the continued destruction of the Earth’s fragile eco-system. If we do not recognise and deal with these threats, we are on a path to self-destruction. We must live the Truth, and defend the message and one and only “nature of man and woman” that our Creator has willed and created. That is the work and responsibility of the devout and the true.

This kind of message is also the seed of discord, intolerance, and wilful ignorance that has led to countless crusades, inquisitions and the spreading of despicable acts and words of violence and hatred in the name of religion.

Nothing says it best, or better, than Milk’s own words—or perhaps warning too: “That, THAT my friends, is true perversion”.