Closing

"Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha, Metta..." The meditation sala reverberated with the sound of our song to the tune of Pachebel. It was a powerful, emotional experience after ten days of observing complete silence.

The retreat came to an end. But was it an end or just the beginning of something? One by one, we shared our personal experiences of our time here...

 A common theme of gratitude echoed in our closing ceremony, as each of us appreciated how, even in complete silence, there was such harmony, such understanding and compassion. It showed in little ways... In our silent nods, in our smiles in the corridor, in the way we quietly went about our lives in this shared space and yet respected one another's need and desire for silence. In silence, we hear our deepest thoughts. In silence, we notice how so little is said with so much in our daily lives.

We shared these last ten days together, strangers at first, yet we have grown and developed together and become friends in the Dhamma. We may come from all walks of life, from all over the world, but something brought us together. It was this unique sanctuary that has been built up from the generosity of countless supporters. It was the guidance and stewardship of resident monastics that united us all in the  comfortable, serene "palace in the forest". And it was our shared faith in the teachings of the Buddha, who over two and a half millennia ago already understood and taught that all life is shared through common experiences of aversion and attachment, of experiencing birth, ageing, illness and death.

We may all have our own personal stories and burdens which we carry with us. Loss of a loved one, death of a sister, a child's worry about his mother's ailing health, stresses and tensions at work, coming to terms with the 'mistakes' and 'wrongs' of the past, realising how much you have fooled yourself and others all these years...  in the end, it all comes down to the human experience of grief and pain, longing and desires, dissatisfaction and regret. In the end, all it comes down to is how our minds meet and perceive the challenges and difficulties in life.

An end could be a beginning, a beginning could mean the end. The retreat is officially over, and tomorrow we will go our separate ways, return to our lives and worldly affairs. But we do so with a lighter heart, with a clearer mind, and with the experience and knowledge that there is joy to be enjoyed in each and every moment if only we allow our minds to see it, to realise it. Life can be simple, pure and clean, or it can be filled with fetters, worries and burdens. However you perceive it, however you live it, it all comes down to attitude.

The abbot shared with us a Japanese poem from his days as a hermit. A beautiful flower, so magnificent and perfect, was seen by one person hidden behind a boulder.  "blooming in glory, unnoticed in fame". We can be like that little flower too. Others may not notice the efforts we have made to work on ourselves, but it will show and radiate in our smiles, in invisible the sense of our tranquility and collectedness.

We have all made  sacrifices to take ten days out of our lives to be here, to strive at perhaps the most difficult task of all in this world, which is to look inward and to tame our minds. Some may scoff at us for being insane, for being out of touch with the world and what is real. But what we have discovered, what we have realised that is far more valuable than gold is the silence and peace of the mind when you are living, being in this very moment.

Hopefully this realisation  will remain with us, and as we go back home, go back to our friends and families, we can share some of that lightness of feeling, some of that joy and clarity with those around us. It is a wonderful and most powerful gift, and yet it costs nothing.


23.48

We started by sharing the joy gazing up at the night sky, Identifying stars and constellations. But we ended up sharing life, touching each others hearts with life experiences and anecdotes. Talking and sharing with her warmed me , and she offered me a warm blanket to keep away the bitter cold.

Live, experience and discover the world, she advised me, and you will discover yourself. Travel, explore, dare, and you will challenge yourself and open your mind. Discover what you want, what you need and what makes you happy. Because there is nothing else in life but to enjoy yourself and what you're doing, and enjoy the person you are with.

 If you're in a situation where you're not happy, get out, change- either the situation, or if you can't, change the way you perceive it. No experience is ever wasted, nothing is ever a failure. If it doesn't not work out, learn from it, grow from the experience and move on, prepared by the experience and lesson you've just had before.

Let go of negative influences, negative emotions, negative reactions. free yourself and you will be free, feel free, and feel like there is so much the world has to offer, whereas you've only scratched a tiny bit of what is out there. And sitting under the stars, watching the universe change and twinkle and meteors flash by, we both were humbled by how small we are, and how little we know...

From family to relationships, from life outlooks to our shared inspiration from Buddhism, we chatted and chatted till we were both shivering and realised we have only five hours (or less!!) to sleep.

"If you want out and can, get out.
If you want out but can't, stay in."