dream

Had such a rough night, lying in bed with so many thoughts in my head. There were so many things i wanted to say out loud to someone, but i could not, just cannot, at least not at this moment. It was getting brighter and burghers by the time I lost consciousness.




I slept badly, and a dream woke me up. I felt like I was late for something, to catch a train I think (tomorrow I need to wake up early to do just that). But in the dream I overslept and by the time I woke up, I had already missed my train, and missed the time I needed to be there for an appointment.

Then in my dream, as I sat there on my bed realising I had missed my train, my thought suddenly turned to mum in the next room. I quickly ran to her room, for she had a plane to catch, and at that she already missed it by two days. How could I completely forget about her flight, I found myself scolding myself in the dream. I entered her room, and indeed she was still sleeping, and just waking up when I walked in. She looked distraught.

I woke up from my, and was so powerfully overwhelmed by a deep deep realisation... Mum is not there any more. I started to moan out loud from the pain of realisation, and I cried, even there were no tears coming out...