Back again

For the first time in over two months, I lay down on my own bed last night, and fell asleep as if it were a dream... There is something so comforting sleeping in your own bed. It may be the scent of the duvet that you are so used to, the softness of the pillow, or the company of the soft toys you are so used to hugging... There seems to be no greater joy than sleeping in the comfort of your own bed.

The first full day back in Montreal it has been. I feel tired still from the travelling, and the back of my head is aching for some reason. It has been aching for a number of days already since I returned, at times, the aching intensifies to the extent that I cannot concentrate properly. At other times, it seems to be completely non-existent. Even so, I really  am happy to be back,  and to be surrounded by the friends and personal belongings I am familiar with. And despite being away for so long, even my cat is warming up to me quickly, purring and lying her back as I play with her.

Last night, a few of my closest friends threw a small get-together on my behalf, and we sat around a table, eating, drinking and re-bonding over stories and  anecdotes from one another's lives which we missed while I was away. At work today, I reconnected with my colleagues, many of whom missed my presence, and were glad to see me back. I remember one vivid moment this afternoon when I broke out in laughter from joy... joy of being part of the carefree banter, merrymaking and  frivolous gossiping that goes on at the office.

 All these people I thought of at times while I was away, and now back again, I appreciate them even more seeing them all again. Through their letters, brief conversations on the phone and greeting cards, they offered their invaluable compassion and care for my wellbeing while I was away and going through difficult times. Now that I am back, they offer their support and kind words of understanding and encouragement for what I am going through. "It is never easy to be away from a parent who is unwell," one person said, "But try to make the most of your time." I feel truly blessed to have this kind of support.

Even if at get-togethers I am  mostly the person who stands at the side, and someone who quietly listens to and smiles at what other people are saying, it feels good to belong, and to know that I am thought of and welcomed with open arms.