Eve of the commemoration

150613.1531

I cannot describe the void. The emptiness. The pain and loneliness. I am wandering around the city, wondering where to go. This was once my city, once my home. Now it is like any other city I'm visiting, except everything looks so familiar, everywhere is littered with memories, both sweet and sour. 

I just want to break down and cry. Tomorrow is the big day, the (pre-poned) anniversary. My stomach of aching again. My mind racing. I am feeling so vulnerable again. Who knows the pain? Who knows how it feels to be here all alone in this city?