Can it be called cheating if you're not officially in a relationship? It still does not take away the shock and surprise, unpleasant surprise.
So eight weeks ago I met this really sweet guy, and we have been seeing each other every single week since. It became a sort of routine, every Thursday after my French class we would meet up and spend almost the whole weekend together. We'd have hours of fun chatting, watching series online, and sleeping next to one another... He liked me, and I liked him. A lot. For the first time in such a long time, I felt I found someone I could talk to, especially as he lost a parent recently as well. There was so much passion, and intimacy, and it felt beautiful...
The second week or so, just before he left, I asked him what we are... "We're dating..." he said, "exclusive with one another." and he said he'd be very jealous if I went to see someone else or slept with someone else. I'd pamper him with what he told me are his favourite foods, and treat him ever so dearly, the way I would a partner. He told me a couple of times I'm too nice to him, and that he doesn't deserve me... Last week again he told me how much he likes me, and how he is so attracted to me...
Tonight I found an ad online which sounded so similar to the one I responded to and which led to our meeting (yes, I was looking online because it's a turn on...). Curiously, I answered it (with a fake email and identity... I admit, my bad...) And within an hour or so came a reply, with the same guy's pictures. I was surprised. What made it worse was minutes before he replied to that email, he was still exchanging messages with me. I asked if he wanted to come over, like he'd done over the past few weeks. He said he was too tired, and that he wanted to stay home...
Stay home? More like hooking up online...
I'm in shock... and very sad. Over the past few weeks I thought we've really bonded and perhaps I was a fool to dream and imagine that it was something really special. Maybe he's just one of those young guys looking for fun, moving from one to the next without commitment or thinking of tomorrow. Who can blame him, especially being younger and having so many years ahead of him still to figure out what he wants...? But I'm deeply disappointed and feel like I've lost a dear friend.
It doesn't help me to heal, but makes me want to withdraw more. Are all guys like this? Dishonest, two-faced and immaturely looking just for instantaneous fun without attachments...? It's scary to think that this is the way the world is...
So eight weeks ago I met this really sweet guy, and we have been seeing each other every single week since. It became a sort of routine, every Thursday after my French class we would meet up and spend almost the whole weekend together. We'd have hours of fun chatting, watching series online, and sleeping next to one another... He liked me, and I liked him. A lot. For the first time in such a long time, I felt I found someone I could talk to, especially as he lost a parent recently as well. There was so much passion, and intimacy, and it felt beautiful...
The second week or so, just before he left, I asked him what we are... "We're dating..." he said, "exclusive with one another." and he said he'd be very jealous if I went to see someone else or slept with someone else. I'd pamper him with what he told me are his favourite foods, and treat him ever so dearly, the way I would a partner. He told me a couple of times I'm too nice to him, and that he doesn't deserve me... Last week again he told me how much he likes me, and how he is so attracted to me...
Tonight I found an ad online which sounded so similar to the one I responded to and which led to our meeting (yes, I was looking online because it's a turn on...). Curiously, I answered it (with a fake email and identity... I admit, my bad...) And within an hour or so came a reply, with the same guy's pictures. I was surprised. What made it worse was minutes before he replied to that email, he was still exchanging messages with me. I asked if he wanted to come over, like he'd done over the past few weeks. He said he was too tired, and that he wanted to stay home...
Stay home? More like hooking up online...
I'm in shock... and very sad. Over the past few weeks I thought we've really bonded and perhaps I was a fool to dream and imagine that it was something really special. Maybe he's just one of those young guys looking for fun, moving from one to the next without commitment or thinking of tomorrow. Who can blame him, especially being younger and having so many years ahead of him still to figure out what he wants...? But I'm deeply disappointed and feel like I've lost a dear friend.
It doesn't help me to heal, but makes me want to withdraw more. Are all guys like this? Dishonest, two-faced and immaturely looking just for instantaneous fun without attachments...? It's scary to think that this is the way the world is...
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