Moments

There are moments you are fine. Just fine. Fine like the day is clear and sunny, fine like fine silk, flawless and smooth.

In these moments, you believe you have already overcome, you have already left the dark shadows of grief and pain.

But then the moments disappears, like morning mist in the dawning sun, like bubbles on a vast, vast oceans...

And I break down. I cry like a baby, cry like I've never cried before. Do they understand? Does anyone know what happens in between the silence of the walls of my little empty home? Does it matter at all whether these tears were shed? Do they look at me like I'm a freak and offer me merely pity?

Let me mourn in my own way, let me cry, let me sleep, let me be alone if I choose to be. For I was deeply injured, in my heart, in my soul, and I need to heal.

I need the time and the space to heal and grow and find the "new normal".