Sleepless in The Hague

I suddenly woke up, from a dream. Dream of me queing at the airport counter, queing to buy a ticket home, a ticket to here. I eventually did manage to get one at a good rate, and it was then that I woke up.

It was completetly dark outside, just past 1am. It is not because of jetlag, I don't think, as I've been busy almost all day helping brother clean and set up the newly renovated house, and was tired when I went to bed. In fact, I had slept right through the night last night, and woke up close to noon.

I lay in bed, and my thoughts seemed to naturally drift to Carmen... I can picture her lying on her bed, her eyes, her face, her thin hands hanging over the bed side...

Is she asleep, or feeling pain and restlessness? Has she been able to eat since I last saw her? Does she still have the strength to speak?

Is she feeling angry, regret... is she fearing death?

I wish I could know, but these are difficult things to ask someone, especially someone who is already so weak and thin...

I wish I could see her, and know that she is alright...

I wish there was something I could do, something I could write to her, something I could give her that would comfort her mind and put her perhaps very agitated and suffering mind at ease...