Lonely Island in Montreal

In the background is music, a voice, singing about a loved one. The voice, though different at different times, is almost always there when I am home. Because it is supposed to remind me that I am not alone in my apartment.

Now that the 'dust' has settled, and as I look around my new apartment, I begin to feel it. The loneliness that grows realising that you are all alone in a foreign country, with no body to talk to, and no body to share your feelings with when you are alone. At night before bed, I lie in bed and imagine someone is there next to me. In the background, the radio will play on until I am asleep.

Perhaps it is this loneliness and not being able to speak to anyone about my feelings here that makes me reflect and think back... think back at my dad... perhaps sad thoughts, perhaps thoughts of longing and missing. I wonder often, in those waking moments just before I drown in sleep, what he is doing, how he is doing, and wonder whether he is watching over me...

I wonder how dad is now, and whether he would be proud of me coming all the way to Canada to study.

A shame that he cannot enjoy this and cannot watch me grow and grow...