At TPE

One by one, I called my relatives to bid them farewell. All of the conversations with the same blessings and well-wishes. I called mum last.

She sounded cheerful, and it was comforting to hear the cheerfulness in her voice. All all mothers, she told me to take care of myself, to eat well, dress warmly, and not to worry. "I will live my life well," she said. Shortly after I left, my brother and two of her friends called to ask her how she's doing. I am so grateful that there are so many people in her life who care about her wellbeing, and who keep in touch with her to encourage her and to give her emotional support.

I gave mum a hug before I boarded the taxi to the airport. I closed my eyes, and wished her well. And I let go. It was not as difficult as I had feared. I had cleaned the house a bit before I left. I bowed before her little shrine, and asked Buddha to watch over her. I stood before dad's portrait, and asked him to look after mum. And I left my big teddy bear on her bed, so that she will have company at night, and together with the pictures I had put up, so that she can surrounded by smiles, warmth and love as  soon as she gets up, and whenever she goes to bed.

Just before I closed the door of the taxi, I gave her another hug, and she was surprised. "Another hug?" she asked.

"Be happy! Live well!" I said. If my thoughts, my warmth and affection could travel, I hope she felt it through my hug. She did not have tears in her eyes, but I think deep down, she must be sad to see me go... But that sadness will pass, and that sadness I believe, can be overwhelmed the beautiful memories we have shared in the past two months.

As the taxi slowly drove away, I wound down the window and called out "Mum!" She turned to wave, and just before the taxi turned a corner, I watched her, head a little down walking back to our front door. Nobody is sure when we will meet again, and under what circumstances. But somehow, that uncertainty does not scare me as much now.

Soon I will take off... and my heart is for once, at least for now, calm and at ease.