I feel uneasy. That gift, all wrapped-up and shining and waiting at my door was still at my door when I got home this evening. I had more or less decided what to do when I left a few days ago to
He said nothing. At least not to me, and just mumbled something to his girlfriend, shaking his head at the same time. As if what I just did was the most unbelievable thing in the world. And that made me feel like the guilty one.
Moments later, the girlfriend came to see me, and started off with chit-chat. But as was expected asked why I don’t want the gift. I said it loud and clear: why give me a gift when you don’t even treat me like a normal person throughout the year? Is this one gift now supposed to make that all better?
But now, thinking back, and looking at the gift on the corridor, I feel bad. Am I a terrible person to turn down someone’s good-will? Why am I not grateful for what I can receive, but instead so full of anger and stubbornness? Am I not foolishly standing by ‘principles’, but unable to see that someone is trying to reach out? It’s just a gift… but behind it, and accepting it, means so much more. Or am I just making things more complicated and guilty of ruining what little is left of our relationship?
Torn.
1 comment:
I personally can't stay angry with people at all, I'm just not one for holding grudges. :)
Maybe things can work out if you both try to work on a better relationship.
I kind of felt the same way about things at home here once, but I'm just trying to stay on friendly terms with my stepfather and mother now. It's just much nicer this way, though there's still bad moments from time to time, but I tend to forget about those quickly. >.>
Hope this is of some help. >.>
*Hugs* Good luck with whatever you decide to do anyway.
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