Intepretation

It's difficult to be 'in between'. And yet I often find myself thrown into situations I'd rather not find myself in.

My brother came home this morning from a three week holiday. Just before going to bed last night, his girlfriend came to my room and asked me to do a 'favour'. She wanted me to stay in my room today and not go downstairs, because she wanted to have a talk with my brother. I felt a little weird, and somewhat offended too that I should be confined to my room without any explaination or reason... but I reluctantly agreed, and so for almost the whole day I stayed upstairs in my room, and only leaving to go to lectures in the afternoon.

Well, now I know what it's all about. When I came home today from classes, his girlfriend pulled me to the side and asked whether I could read something and "intepret" what it meant. I asked her what it was about, and all she said was to just read it, and tell her what I thought.

It was a chat log... between some girl in the US my brother met eight years ago with whom he had a short, but apparently deep relationship. I started reading, but the very moment I realised what this "something" I had been asked to "interpret" meant I stopped reading. I don't want to get involved. I don't need to be drawn into someone's complex relationship and become part of the problem.

So I gave the six page chat log back to the girlfriend, and told her frankly what I felt. I refuse to be part of a conspiracy. I refuse to be part of an evolving episode of distrust and to be the umpire in other people's personal affairs. Though I did give her this very simple advice: it's between you two.

She wasn't too pleased. She wanted a 'second opinion', since I'm the one who's supposed to be interpreting documents and construing the meaning and intentions behind the words. But in very diplomatic language I said I'm simply not interested, and need to defend my own stand. I told her, and this is the truth, that I hadn't read through the dialogue clearly enough to start saying what I think is going on between the two. I'm not going to start construing other people's feelings and intentions based on a very personal dialogue which should not even be shown to me in the first place.

No is no.
No means no.
I refuse to be involved.