Loving you, loving me: poem

I wrote this poem sometimes agao, after a period of time I was having terrrible nightmare and sleeplessness.

Actually this poem was put to music by my ex and together we won first prize at a music competition (Jugend Komponiert 2002, Berlin/Brandenburg).

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A DIRGE TO CHILDHOOD

It is that time to write like mad.

I should be sleeping

But I do not feel like it,

As if I fear the next time

I am awake, I open my eyes

Will be a world of trouble,

A place of sudden sorrow.

There’s no turning back,

Not at this moment,

Not at this time.

Where the sun slowly sets,

Darkness looms and lives

In the forever green forest.

What an exciting journey it be!

Onwards, forwards, towards

The days of hope, the nights of peace.

Memories wave across the sacred land

With the blue tide and ebb

Of dried eyes and coloured dreams.

Bitter, bright, sour and sweet,

So taste the branches of tree of life,

So sounds the grassy breath,

So smells the flowery song.

But behind the very veil of time,

Hide the shadows of deep secrets,

Prowls the greying, echoing winds

Of change and coldness.

It is a mask I wear,

So solid and so safe

Like an armour and a sword;

For I am invincible,

I am fearless and I am brave.

But inside, somewhere

You know deep inside,

A face is clouding,

Howling, thundering, moaning,

A child is crying.