Breaking out

For a few days now I've been avoiding people. I go to school and avoid being seen, and then I head home again, and rarely step out the door. Friends invite me to events, but I say I'm too tired or not interested... And that's what I really am... Tired and disinterested...

Sleep has been my refuge... sleep, and eating lots of chocolate and suddenly craving fried bacon with lots of grease. So I stay home, in bed, lie next to my cat, close my eyes and let sleep take over. And it's not difficult to just drift away. Drift away, and let sleep overcome me and my consciousness. Sleep seems to have such a powerful effect on me now, even if I'm not tired. Somehow, it seems to be more interesting than being awake...

And today I woke up, and went out for a long bike ride. It was cold, but the sun was bright. I rode my bike, rode and rode along the river. Just riding I think helped me clear my mind and thoughts, and get rid of the drowsiness and torpor... I felt active, and alive.

 I could spend my days in sleep... or I could spend my days awake and living.