"Stationary condition"

I noticed the many deep folds in her eyelids, and crow's feet that trailed from the corners of the closed eyes. Mum looked tired, and temporarily rested while the nurse inserted the needle into a button-like valve just under her shoulder blades. I cringed, and felt my knees weaken. But in my mind, I imagined what it must be like for her, for the dozens of other patients around me, and the queasiness disappeared.

Earlier, on the doctor's computer screen I saw the words "stationary condition", and was relieved to read and hear that there has been no abnormal activity since the last CT scan. It helps to have the children around, the doctor said, and commented something about dropping birth rates in Taiwan. Perhaps nobody is as relieved as mum, who for the last couple of hours, or even days, was feeling worried and anxious. The cancer index has even halved, though the doctor suggested that she continue with the chemo treatment, and after a few more times it may not be necessary any more. I could see that mum was encouraged by the news, and I patted her gently, and told her to continue like this, to look forward to good things and future plans. For hope can drive a person, can help heal a little, and help boost the body when the body is weak.

Mum opened her eyes again, and smiled at me. She looked energetic and hopeful as I smiled back. Mum was visibly touched by the attentiveness and care with which the nurse helped ease her into her seat. The nurse replied that in this ward, everyone is a "treasured customer". I looked at the nurses quietly at work, walking to attend the needs of the dozens of people in the ward. Despite the heaviness and constant confrontation with illness and death, they still somehow manage to maintain their warmth, their human-ness, their compassion and understanding for the thousands and thousands of patients who come in day in, day out, day after day after day. I thanked the nurses, and silently wished them the strength and courage to continue to care for, smile at and touch the bodies and hearts of so many who need them.